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“You convinced me I wasn't good enough”: woman's Facebook post to the boyfriend who destroyed her self-esteem

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A young woman has written an emotional Facebook post hitting back at her ex-boyfriend who destroyed her self-esteem.

Brittany Lynn Shane’s message, which has since gone viral, describes all the ways in which her ex criticised her appearance and belittled her, gradually causing her to adapt to the perfect image of womanhood he held in his mind - from the type of hair he liked, to her weight and even her tattoos and piercings.

“You always told me I didn't look good with long hair and that you preferred girls with short hair,” writes Brittany, who lives in Alabama, United States, and describes her profession as a nanny.

“So I kept my hair cut above my shoulders at all times.

“You laughed at me and told me I looked ridiculous when I dyed my hair red when we were together. So a week later I dyed it back blonde.”

Each time Brittany mentions a part of her image that her boyfriend didn’t like, she mentions how she adapted herself to please him.

Eventually, Brittany describes how she even “started eating less everyday” because her ex told her she was gaining weight.

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Brittany today

“For almost two years you had me convinced that you were out of my league and that I just wasn't good enough the way I was. I did everything I could to be what you wanted. I did everything you told me to do. It still wasn't good enough. You left me for a younger prettier girl,” she says.

At the end of her post, which Brittany has accompanied with a photograph of herself looking happy with a shock of bright red hair, she writes:

“Up until a few months ago I blamed myself for everything that happened. You blamed me too. But finally I started to see the truth. You weren't out of my league. I was out of yours. I wasn't the one who wasn't good enough for you. You were the one who wasn't good enough for me. You couldn't accept me for who I was. When I took you the way you were.

“The only time I ever asked you to change was when I asked you to show me you actually cared about me. Which you never did,” she continues.

Brittany writes about how today, months after the break-up she is now living live as her true self – bright red hair, tattoos (which her boyfriend didn’t like) and is happier than she’s ever been. She says that now she’s moved past it all and is being herself, she’s finally confident again.

You always told me I didn't look good with long hair and that you preferred girls with short hair. So I kept my hair...

Posted by Brittaney Lynn Shane on Friday, 4 December 2015

“I eat whatever I want whenever I want and weigh 135 pounds. I still have my stretch marks. And I've finally gotten my confidence back,” she says.

“It's humiliating to even think about how low I got. But what gives me the guts to come out about this is the fact that I overcame it and I'm finally back to who I really am.”

Brittany’s post has now been liked almost 400,000 times and shared over 35,000 times.

People have commented below the teen’s post to congratulate her on her bravery, telling her she is “so beautiful just the way [she] is” and saying thank you and “you go girl” for her message.

One woman commented saying Brittany’s message had inspired her to tell her daughter about the story:

“Very inspirational. I'm sharing this with my 10 year old daughter to show her how she should not be treated. No one has the right to tear you down. That isn't how humans should treat each other. Much love, thank you for your message of self-love. Every girl needs to see this!!!!!”

Another added: "This brought tears to my eyes."

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