“Rose Gold, right?”

I started again. A Disney prince lookalike stood in front of me. I recognized him. He came in all the time to buy video games.

The teenage boy pointed at my nametag. “Okay, I cheated. I’m Brandon,” he said.

I stared at Brandon, afraid anything I said would make him go away. He held eye contact — did I have something on my face? I grabbed his items off the conveyor belt: a video game with a soldier holding a gun on its cover and four bags of peanut M&M’s.

Brandon kept talking. “I go to Deadwick High.”

He was younger than me. I was already eighteen and had earned my high school certificate.

“Okay,” I said. I was supposed to say something else. Why was someone as cute as Brandon talking to me in the first place?

“Did you go to DHS?”

I scratched my nose so my hand would cover my teeth. “I was homeschooled.”

“Cool.” Brandon smiled at his feet. “I was wondering if you’d go out with me.”

“Where?” I asked, bewildered.

He laughed. “Like, on a date.”

I scanned the empty store. Brandon stood there, hands in his pockets, waiting for an answer. I thought of Phil, my online boyfriend.

“I don’t know.”

“Come on,” Brandon said. “I promise I don’t bite.”

He leaned over the counter when he said this. Our faces were a foot apart. Tiny freckles dotted his nose. He smelled like boy soap. My heart started doing puppy jumps. I could finally get my first kiss. Did it count as cheating if you’d never met your online boyfriend in person?

Brandon winked then closed his eyes. How was this so easy for him? I should close my eyes too. But what if I missed his mouth and kissed his nose? Eyes open, then. Should I use my tongue? The magazines said to sometimes use tongue. But not teeth. Never teeth.

My teeth.

I couldn’t let him that close to my teeth. Plus, Scott might see us. Our faces were now inches apart. I had been leaning over the counter without realizing it. I was going to mess up. I wasn’t ready. I jerked my head back.

“Not a great time,” I mumbled.

He opened his eyes and cocked his head. “What’d you say?” “I said it’s not a great time.” I held my breath.

He waved me off. “I didn’t even suggest a time. Are you busy forever?”

I was never busy, but that wasn’t the right answer. I cracked my knuckles and tried to swallow. My throat was dry.

Brandon raised his eyebrows. “Are you gonna make me beg?”

I imagined spending the next forty-eight hours reliving every word of this conversation. I just had to get out before I screwed up. I tucked a strand of hair— short and stringy — behind my ear. “I’m sorry,” I said to his T-shirt.

Brandon took a step back from the counter. His cheeks turned pink. He looked around, but no one else was nearby. I watched his smile morph into a sneer. I must have said the wrong thing. I flinched, waiting.

“Are you busy pretending to need a wheelchair?” My mouth fell open. My hand covered it.

“And you think you can hide those teeth? They’re fucking disgusting. You’re fucking disgusting,” Brandon hissed.

Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“I only asked you out because my friend dared me,” he said. On cue, an overjoyed boy popped out from behind Register 2. Tears began to well in my eyes.

“Like you could reject me?” Brandon scoffed, and then strolled off with his plastic Gadget World bag. His friend high-fived him. The first fat tear escaped and rolled down my cheek.

As soon as they left, I speed-walked away from my register, ignoring Arnie’s stare. I thought about Maleficent and Jafar and Cruella de Vil and Scar and Captain Hook: the bad guys always lost in the end.

The break room was empty. I closed the door and locked it.

I hadn’t sobbed that hard since I’d heard my mother’s verdict two months ago.

***

Exclusive: read the first 2 chapters of 2020’s biggest thriller, The Recovery of Rose Gold