These people aren’t bad at running – in fact, many of them are categorically good. But no matter how fast they go or how much distance they cover, they feel the need to offer an explanation for every activity they upload to the app. Some of the best range from complaints about the weather (“ultimate sweat fest”) and technical malfunctions (“headphones died at 6km”) to feeling hungover (“trying not to be sick lol”) and nods to unspecified, historic injuries (“the knee pain is back”).

Even when said runner has achieved a PB, they’ll still feel the need to bring out the explanations – often describing their performance as a “fluke” or “v unexpected”. No rest for the wicked, eh?

I say all this in the knowledge that I’m guilty of adopting the explainer persona. Scrolling through my past activities on Strava makes me physically cringe, purely because of the elaborate headlines I’ve come up with over the years. Some of my personal favourites (and by favourites, I mean the most gag-inducing) include: “You can always count on running to humble you”; “Parkrun sponsored by #hayfever”; and “Humidity 81% *red-faced, hot and sweaty emoji*”.

Strava: “Why do I feel the need to make excuses for all of my runs?”