I’m always craving or romanticising a weekend of having no plans and just being at home and doing nothing. But when I do manage to carve out a Sunday to rest and switch off, my mind hooks onto this idea that I should be doing something productive. Maybe it’s getting on top of my chores to make the start of a new week easier or digging into that new book I’ve been promising myself I’ll read for months. I feel guilty if I’m simply sitting on the sofa doing nothing. I feel as though I’m being lazy or squandering away my weekend.

From talking to friends, I’m not the only one who feels a sense of guilt when it comes to resting. “Many of us have internalised the belief that being busy equals being productive, and any moment not spent actively working toward our goals is perceived as wasted time,” explains Dr Rina Bajaj, a counselling psychologist and the author of The Magic In Me.

She adds that some people may also fear being judged by others for taking breaks, especially if they see that their peers or colleagues are always busy and productive.

But why do so many of us value productivity? Dr Bajaj says that a person’s sense of self-worth could be closely tied to this. “People may feel guilty when they aren’t actively working because they equate their value as a person with how much they accomplish – believing that they should always be productive and never need to rest.”

This guilt will inevitably get worse as we feel more tired or burned out and can’t meet our own expectations.

“It’s crucial to recognise that rest is not only acceptable but essential for our overall wellbeing. Just as our bodies require food and water to function optimally, they also need rest to recharge and rejuvenate,” says Dr Bajaj.

So, here are five tips and advice to tackle that feeling of guilt and ensure you’re properly resting:

Establish clear boundaries between work or other responsibilities and rest time: “Allow yourself to disconnect from work during designated rest periods and incorporate regular rest breaks into your daily or weekly schedule. Whether it’s short breaks throughout the day or dedicated rest days, prioritise time to properly switch off.”

Be kind to yourself and practise self-compassion: We all have to take care of our wellbeing so instead of fixating on the amount of time spent resting, focus on the quality of your rest, shares Dr Bajaj.

Engage in activities that help you relax and recharge: Allow yourself to fully enjoy these moments without judgment or guilt while also starting to shift your mindset away from equating productivity solely with constant activity. “Remember that rest and relaxation are integral components of being productive.”

Communicate your need for rest to others: “Set clear boundaries and communicate your availability so that others understand and respect your need for rest.”

Stay present and mindful during your rest periods: Dr Bajaj says it’s important to focus on the sensations of relaxation and fully immerse yourself in the moment without worrying about what you ‘should’ be doing.

Do you feel bad for resting or taking a day to do nothing? How to tackle the guilt of rest