Before we can fully realise the benefits regret can hold, it’s important to learn how to identify what Pink describes as the four core regrets most people have. Each category of regret has a key lesson it is meant to teach.

For Pink, if we examine our regrets and ask ourselves questions about them, it means we can understand ourselves better and come closer to living a good life.

Foundation
These regrets are related to the groundwork of our lives, such as getting a decent education, staying healthy and managing our money. They depend on our capacity to be conscientious and responsible. Get these basics right and we thrive – but slip up and regret follows.

Boldness
We are all offered countless chances in life and it’s up to us whether we choose to take them or not. According to Pink, being bold and taking risks leads to less regret.

Moral
Although we may rationalise them at the time, there are choices that we know, deep down, are wrong even when we’re making them. Whether they involve lying to a spouse, swindling a business partner or cheating on a test, these types of regrets are insidious because they compromise our belief in our own goodness.

Connection
There are always going to be people in our lives who are fundamental to our sense of self: partners, parents, siblings or friends. When we neglect these relationships there is a deep and abiding sense of loss.

The 4 types of regret and how looking back can help us lead a better life