“Sometimes I pick the skin off my feet and eat it. I’ve gone too hard sometimes and my feet have hurt to walk on the next day.”

“While it might seem unusual, skin-picking behaviours (dermatillomania) are quite common and often linked to anxiety or sensory stimulation needs,” says Weber. “Unfortunately, these habits, while common, are often secretive and feel shameful. Skin picking is often compulsive and can be a way to self-soothe, but it can become harmful if it disrupts daily life.

“Habit-reversal techniques and stress management practices are often effective. Keeping hands busy with fidget objects or exploring therapy centred on body-focused repetitive behaviours (BFRBs) can help manage urges. Whatever approach, self-compassion is helpful, and it’s a radical and liberating choice to accept these sides of yourself.”

“I truly cannot ever be alone with my thoughts in the quiet. I could never sit in a room in silence, for example. Whatever I’m doing, I want the TV or music playing in the background.”

So normal, so common. Does anyone like being alone with their thoughts? But it’s something we could all do with working on. “Yes, many people avoid silence as it can feel overwhelming or anxiety-inducing, especially if it brings up uncomfortable thoughts or feelings,” says Weber. “But you’re missing out on the joy of keeping yourself company. I’m curious to know what you’re afraid you’ll discover. If it’s dark and twisted, well, everyone is on some level, and it’s often the shadow parts of ourselves that contain interesting layers of our personality.

“This avoidance may suggest underlying anxiety, or perhaps unresolved feelings that surface in quiet moments. It can also indicate a need for constant stimulation or a fear of introspection. We’ve been socialised to constantly distract ourselves from our inner world, and modern life offers constant consumption and self-escapism. Gradual exposure to short periods of quiet, perhaps with guided meditation or soothing background sounds, may help reduce discomfort. Therapy could also provide a safe space to explore any underlying thoughts that might make silence feel intimidating. You could give yourself the micro-challenge of three minutes without any noise or screens – see how it feels. It can be exhilarating to realise that you can face yourself and even like the experience. But also take note that most of us are in flight from ourselves on some level, and we hide and cover up in all sorts of ways. Be kind to yourself for avoiding yourself, but also please know that whatever it is you might be avoiding, you can deal with.”

“I eat hot chocolate powder with a spoon.”

Very common! Pillai says: “Many people can remember doing this from childhood, and often these memories bring us comfort and nostalgia. While I wouldn’t recommend doing this regularly due to the sugar content, I think this is perfectly fine.”

“I’m so soothed by having my feet held… but only if I’m wearing socks. The idea of my bare foot being held is horrific.”

Lockwood says: “This is an indication of comfort-seeking. It is quite normal for people to not want their bare feet to be held. Someone who likes to have their feet held may have unconscious memories of a parent or carer doing this when they were a baby and it made them feel safe and secure. Although in our conscious memories we may not remember a specific time, our bodies remember the feeling it gave, and this is why it is soothing.”

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