Content note: this article contains discussions of rape that readers may find upsetting.

I’m at a wedding, waiting for another glass of prosecco, when the memory hits: I was 16, and after having a drink of whisky and smoking weed handed to me by an older man, I had blacked out. I opened my eyes, the room still spinning, and realised I had somehow made it upstairs. I was in a bed with the older man on top of me. The door was closed and locked. The other men, who I thought were my friends, were downstairs. I got a burst of energy and bolted up, ran down the stairs, and sobbed as I asked these ‘friends’ what was happening. I left the house and headed home after they responded by looking at each other shiftily and offering no explanation.

I went 14 years without thinking about that day. I wonder if some part of my brain made the decision to protect me from the knowledge of what happened, to block out that memory. I have no idea why, at that wedding, my brain stopped blocking, but I do know that I went back to the hotel room after that and felt a whole mess of things, all culminating in one question: what do I do now?

For many people, the news that came out over the weekend will have brought up similar complex emotions. Multiple allegations of rape and sexual assault have emerged concerning Russell Brand, including one story from a woman who was 16 at the time. These women have bravely spoken out years after the alleged incidents, and this will have prompted us to wonder about our own experiences. Can we address a sexual assault from the past? Should we? And how? What exactly are our options?

Everyone should be empowered to address a sexual assault, if they choose to, no matter how long ago it happened. Whether you’re in need of emotional support, want to pursue legal action or don’t know what you want, there are options available. We break them down ahead.

How to address an experience of rape or sexual assault