The Great British Bake Off contestants tackle dairy for the first time, here’s what we made of episode four. Warning, spoilers ahead…
1. How can it be dairy week on a baking show? Bread made out of just milk? Biscuits that are pure cream? What am I not getting??
2. I will give £1 to the first person that makes a “there’s no use crying over spilt milk” joke.
3. Henry dresses like a head boy and that’s a look I can get on board with.
4. Moist is such an awful word.
5. Can everyone stop saying moist please!
6. “’I went for a full mouthful’ that’s just not a sentence many boys say to me.” I wish Sandi Toksvig was my aunt.
7. And Sandi’s fruit shirt is everything.
8. I wonder if I’d tried making a cake ten times and it only worked once if I’d do it anyway?
9. Helena is making a cute ghost cake. I love her commitment to the goth theme.
10. Hmmm, what tastes would evoke my memories of childhood like Michelle? Glace cherries, Alphabites and flora margarine.
11. It really warms my heart when everyone helps. It’s like when all the cars on a road move out the way to let an ambulance through.
12. Imagine being someone that just made a Bundt cake at the weekend. I’ll never be that person.
13. OH MICHAEL!!!!!! This is why nine failures isn’t a good ratio for success.
14. “Don’t be nice to me yet” Isn’t it funny how we hate people being nice to us when something has gone tits up.
15. “For a mad woman you’re doing well”. PRUE! NO!
16. Michael, it’s not just a cake. It never is.
17. I quite enjoy the fact they’ve chosen the favourite cake of Henry VIII the worst monarch of all time, for this technical.
18. Does Prue actually cook the example technical? Or does she just quality control them?
19. I wish I’d been invited to Sandi’s wedding.
20. Curdled cheese looks like it’s all been scooped out a drain.
21. “How aren’t you crying?”
“I haven’t got time to cry?”
I’ve always got time to cry Priya…
22. Why is Paul so cross that no one can cook a thing that no one on the planet has heard of?
23. “If I go I don’t want to go feeling like this “ Michael, you are exactly as emotional as I am.
24. Oooh, I’ve got Paul’s mug. And I really like that yellow Le Crueset in the background.
25. “Getting all mishti eyed. Sandi is on excellent form tonight.
26. Noel cries at everything too! I have found my people tonight.
27. Biscuit spoons are the best things I have ever seen Helena!
28. Henry, stop opening the freezer door!! Even I know that’s a bad plan when you want something that’s pure liquid to set in a very small amount of time.
29. Steph has secretly done very well and I haven’t really noticed. A stealth dark horse with the best fringe ever.
30. I think Phil and his lovely jazzy flamingo shirt might be in trouble tonight.
31. The only person older than me has now left the tent. Oh.
32. Nothing like a mum telling their daughter to believe in themselves to break me into two hundred pieces.
The Great British Bake Off is on Channel 4
Images: Channel 4