Next time you’re faced with a delicate social situation you don’t know how to navigate, wonder this… what would a cat do?
While a needy dog will let you know if he hasn’t had his tummy scratched in the last five minutes, it’s fair to say it will take a bit more to faze your average cat.
And if you’ve ever experienced the frosty disdain of a haughty moggy, you’ll know that social niceties are pretty much rock bottom on a cat’s list of concerns.
So maybe we could learn a thing or two from our four-legged friends?
Could borrowing feline behavioural techniques have a positive impact on our own social lives?
Here are five typically awkward social situations solved by a more cat-like approach…
1. The first date
You’re on a date, and despite some decidedly tepid conversation about where you went to uni, it’s gone fairly well.
You’re not sure whether a kiss is on the cards, though.
You’d like it to be, but you don’t want to seem too keen, or worse still, go for the snog and get knocked back.
Your solution? The “cat’s kiss”.
You know that thing where a cat stares at you doing a very slow, methodical blink? That’s a cat’s way of showing it likes you.
Your date is so entranced by your mysterious blinking, they can’t help but lean in for the smooch. Jackpot.
2. The tricky menu
You’re having dinner with friends, and although you’ve been very clear on what you do and don’t want to eat, everyone else is keen to do sharing plates.
Now you are looking at the prospect of enjoying one sixth of the dish you had your eye on, and five sixths of some other stuff you aren’t remotely interested in.
A cat would feel your pain. The optimum situation for a cat would be a bowl of water in one place, a bowl of Whiskas Pure Delight (a range of tasty wet cat food pouches, containing all the nutritional ingredients cats need to be at their beautiful, unique best) somewhere entirely different, and a treat or two from the cat care range.
Any other arrangement, and a cat will likely stalk away in disgust. Threaten to do the same if your friends won’t budge on the small plates.
Social awkwardness will see them fold every time…
3. The boring meeting
You’ve been sat in a meeting about “2020 strategy” for nearly an hour, and so far it sounds suspiciously similar to the same old guff you sat through in 2019.
You really, really want an excuse to get back to your desk, but the presentation still has 13 slides left to run, so it’s time for desperate measures.
What do cats do when they’re bored? They start knocking things off the nearest surface of course.
Tipping a mug of tea into your lap will earn you a mix of concerned and wary looks, but it will also give you a cast-iron excuse to get up and leave.
Be careful to spill it on your own lap though. This is your get-out-of-jail-free card, not Sharon’s from accounts.
4. The last-minute bail
You idly agreed to meet up with an old colleague for drinks approximately six weeks ago, and rudely, they’re still expecting you to turn up.
Naturally, on the day of the meet-up, all you want to do is go home and sleep. But bailing out is going to make you feel super-guilty…
Stop. If your cat were offered the choice between sleep and socialising, would there even be a decision to make?
Bail out of your plans, cuddle up somewhere warm and purr to your heart’s content.
Then, when you’re feeling rested, do the digital equivalent of scratching at your friend’s door, and badger them with endless WhatsApp messages until they give you a new date.
5. The neglectful partner
Your other half isn’t paying you enough attention.
Apparently work is very busy, and they just need to get this presentation finished, so could you maybe give them an hour to get it done and then you can both watch Love Island?
Obviously, this isn’t acceptable.
Your only recourse is to prowl into the room where they’re working, sit on their laptop, and bat at their face until they give you the attention you deserve.
If they love you, this behaviour will be greeted with an indulgent roll of the eyes and a picture on Insta captioned “how am I supposed to work with this one around!!”
Having taken some life cues from your feline friend, the least you can do is keep them in peak condition. From wet and dry food to delicious treats with added health benefits, Whiskas® has everything you need to provide your pet with nutritious cat care.