It’s a huge problem: research published in 2013 showed that UK women spend five hours more than men a week on unpaid labour within the home, with 60% of women reporting feeling that they do “more than their fair share” of household chores.

And, with nearly all advertisements for cleaning products featuring women and designed to appeal to women, it’s no wonder that this Mumsnet post had such a huge reaction: many in the online community have come forward to reveal that their partners, too, often deploy the “if you want me to do something, just ask” argument – something that initially appears positive, but still places the onus on women to think about and organise the tasks.

With all these obstacles to gender parity, what’s a working woman to do? Philosophy professor Alexandra Bradner suggests on the Atlantic’s website that couples sit down with a list of questions like, “Do I do half of the laundry and half of the dishes every day?” to figure out where they’re slacking off in comparison to their mate.

This sounds, admittedly, exhausting – but there is something to be said for sitting down, talking over household chore expectations and getting some balance in place if you feel like you unfairly shoulder the lion’s share. After all, if you want him to do something…

Why this seemingly harmless phrase perpetuates sexism in a relationship