Along with this heightened sensitivity, the children of emotionally absent parents may have learned to suppress or dismiss their emotions during childhood as a way to cope, says counselling psychologist Dr Rina Bajaj. “As a result, they may struggle with identifying and managing their emotions effectively, leading to emotional volatility, emotional numbing, or difficulty expressing their needs and desires.”

According to attachment theory, she adds, secure attachment to our caregivers (usually our parents) is “essential” for healthy emotional and social development. “When a father is emotionally unavailable, it may result in an insecure attachment style, such as avoidant or anxious attachment.”

Alice recalls that after leaving home, she wasn’t convinced she was a good person. “I entered a manipulative relationship that I mistook for love and was bent on outside approval for my self-worth.” Dealing with rejection when relationships haven’t worked out has also been hard for Molly, who says she has probably stayed in relationships that weren’t right for her. “The feeling of being rejected or having a relationship fail supports the evidence that my brain already has: that I’m not good enough for someone’s love.”

Dating can be difficult to navigate, too, says Molly, especially when complex family situations are flattened into a classic narrative of ‘a woman with daddy issues’. “It’s a very vulnerable thing to reveal to someone you’re dating,” she adds, suggesting that she’s found discussing it early on to be beneficial. “If someone isn’t prepared to be with someone that has parental difficulties, it can lead to a lot more heartache,” she says, especially if you only discover this about them further down the line.

“It creates a deep deficiency”: what it’s like to grow up with an emotionally unavailable dad