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The 59 best and funniest feminist comebacks ever to grace the internet

Posted by
Kayleigh Dray
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Whether they’re aimed at cleavage shaming, discriminatory dress codes, mansplaining, or misogyny in general, these are the funniest feminist comebacks to grace the internet. Ever.

Ah, feminists.

If you delve into the misogynist depths of social media and read what some idiots people are saying about us, you’ll quickly come to the conclusion that we’re all unsmiling, embittered, sex-starved, man-hating witches. We keep our hair short, our shoes flat, and our bras brightly aflame. We mewl and cry over ‘silly’ first world issues (like, say, the fact that the USA’s pussy-grabbing president has waged war on our reproductive organs).

And, of course, we meet in secret and plot to capture every single male human, so that we can chain them up in an underground dungeon and milk them of their semen. Because, y’know, that’s what abolishing the patriarchy is really all about.

Perhaps the most common complaint about feminists, however, is that we don’t have a sense of humour. “It’s just a bit of banter,” misogynists will tell us, before ordering us to “lighten up” and (our favourite) “give us a smile”.

It goes without saying, of course, that they’ve got it completely wrong: feminists are actually really f**king funny. In fact, we’re probably the most hilarious people on the internet. Don’t believe us? We’ll prove it.

Sit back and relax as we navigate you through the internet’s best, funniest, and – above all else – saltiest feminist comebacks ever.

  • On children’s books

    We know some ridiculous people have a problem with female genitalia, and that they’ll go to any lengths to avoid talking about them (or even referring to them by name). However, you’d imagine a book created to educate young girls about their vaginas would have the courage to say so on the front cover.

    What’s Down There? was the hesitant title applied to a children’s book about vaginas, vulvas, and the like – and Twitter had a field day over the pictures. When the likes of Jameela Jamil and Rosie Bennett took umbrage with the title, though, the book’s publishers were quick to respond.

    “Please don’t judge our book by its cover,” they said. “Far from skirting around the subject (pun intended), the book’s title was carefully chosen for the exact purpose of highlighting the confusion around the terminology for female genitalia. Inside the books you’ll see all the correct terms.”

    Fair enough, we suppose – but plenty of the women who responded pointed out that the male equivalent of the book (aptly titled That’s MY Willy) featured two little boys on the front. The girl’s book, however, featured two little boys staring down at a naked girl’s genitalia.

    What’s Down There?” someone asked. “[This is something] people say moments before they are killed in a horror film!”

    Well, quite.

  • On sexist advertising

    Gillette released a highly charged #MeToo-inspired US TV ad calling for men to not only not escape toxic masculinity but also to educate their children about new ways to be male. Men, naturally, were extremely unhappy about being told what to do by a grooming advert. Cue a spate of hilarious reactions from women everywhere.

  • On dressing for men

    Perfection.

  • On dressing for men (part 2)

    Boom.

  • On literally all men

    If we had a penny for every time we’ve been subjected to the #NotAllMen argument, we’d finally own that tropical island we’ve been dreaming of…

  • On showing more skin

    There’s nothing we love more than an amazing show of feminist goodwill, unless, of course, it’s an amazing show of feminist goodwill with added potato skins.

  • And while we’re on the subject of girls showing too much skin…

    If you find our outfits to be too distracting, you’re almost definitely the problem.

  • On saying sorry

    Let’s not.

  • On make-up

    Exactly.

  • On catcalling

    It may have been a sugary donut, but it made for one seriously salty comeback.

  • On female representation in TV and films

    As a gender, we’re sure women could never even dream of understanding how it must feel to be treated like second-class citizens in Hollywood.

  • And on that note...

    Anna Kendrick is the hero that women everywhere deserve, quite frankly.

  • And just one more...

    We guess that means women were slaying at ghosting long before it was cool.

  • On rape culture

    Time to start holding men to the exact same confines we’ve lived in since the dawn of time, maybe?

  • On double standards

    Preach.

  • On how to respond to any guy who demands ‘entertainment’ on #TitsOutTuesday

    How do we love thee, feminist badasses of the Twitterverse? Let us count the ways…

  • On sexual harassment

    He will have definitely needed a lot of ice for that killer burn.

  • On the patriarchy

    Maybe men will, one day, begin to understand what’s actually happening.

  • On cleavage-shaming

    When Susan Sarandon opted for a V-neck at the SAG Awards, she was criticised and hounded on social media by men and women alike for daring to show her cleavage. There was one person in particular, however, who wouldn’t leave her alone: television presenter and Daily Mail columnist, Piers Morgan. Which makes this salty #TBT photo all the more perfect.

  • On the Friend Zone

    Flawless.

  • On body-shaming

    We actually think that would make a pretty awesome TV show, to be honest…

  • On the concept of vanity

    Who’s got a duck face now, eh?

  • On mansplaining

    Yup, it seems as if Sophia has got Twitter well and truly covered.

  • On the #MeToo movement

    We kind of want to print this off a million times and start handing it out as our business card, to be honest.

  • On Instagram’s bizarre censorship rules

    Remember: male nipples are absolutely fine. It’s female nipples that will make the world burn.

  • On those outdated gender stereotypes

    Oh, misogynists – when will you learn? Also, get back in the garage: that fanbelt won’t tighten itself, y’know.

  • On fashion

    The menfolk will never see us coming.

  • On periods

    Any man who attempts to draw a correlation between a woman’s moods and her menstrual cycle is doomed to fail.

  • On mansplaining (again)

    This made us snort-laugh in public.

  • On nature

    Aha, now we finally know the backstory to Jaws.

  • On misogynist tabloid headlines

    Someone had to do it.

  • On meninists and Piers Morgan

    Nick Offerman, we salute you.

  • On marriage

    For those who are wondering, the Oxford Dictionary defines ‘radical’ as “advocating or based on thorough or complete political or social change; representing or supporting an extreme or progressive section of a political party”.

    So, yeah, getting married to someone you don’t hate, we guess.

  • On pregnancy

    Remember what we said about milking the semen of manacled men? We won’t need to bother if we figure this out.

  • On the ‘weaker sex’

    Absolutely.

  • On telling us to smile

    Fun experiment: let’s all try telling strange men to ‘smile’ and report back our findings at the end of the week.

  • On sexist dress codes

    According to White House sources, Donald Trump has told female staff that they need to “dress like women”, before clarifying that most women still feel pressured to wear dresses in order to impress him. Naturally, this sparked ire online… and a number of brilliant responses, just like the one above.

  • On boringly misogynist assumptions

    The power of a good hashtag is undeniable.

  • On social media trolls

    Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to invite JK Rowling along.

  • On consent

    Once again, proof that a good cup of tea can solve pretty much anything in life.

  • On everyone who balked at the idea of an all-female Ghostbusters film

    The woman is a genius.

  • On sexist social media comments

    Yes. So much yes.

  • On female dragonflies

    We’ve literally never related to anything more.

  • On the fair division of household chores

    To paraphrase Wolf on Wall Street: “Pick up a mop, and start cleaning.”

  • On those outdated gender narratives

    We could use the money. Consider us commissioned, Alison Becker.

  • On unsolicited opinions

    We’ve always been a fan of the strong, silent type. Actually… strike strong.

  • On the lack of women being promoted

    Studies have repeatedly shown that women are more likely to be ‘top performers,’ but less likely to be the boss. What gives?

  • On the concept of 'female privilege'

    Get the f**k over yourselves, dudes.

  • On fashion (again)

    Our illustrious leader Lisa Smosarski once informed us that pockets are, of course, a feminist issue. Why? Well, women traditionally didn’t have pockets because, not having any access to money, they wouldn’t have had anything to put in them. In the 1700s, they got around this by putting slits in their skirts by which they could access a pouch slung around their midsection. And, nowadays, we STILL don’t get them in the majority of our jeans. What gives, eh?

  • On outdated romantic narratives

    Shall I compare thee to a bra? Thou art more clingy and uncomfortable…

  • On being mysterious AF

    Sigh.

  • On catcalling

    Any comeback that involves impersonating a velociraptor is a good comeback. Fact.

  • On fashion (just one more)

    PREACH!

  • On the gender pay gap

    It almost hurts to smile at this one.

  • On tampons

    We pity his fragile male ego.

  • On feminism

    Believe in equality of the sexes? Then you are a feminist, simple as.

  • On sexist internet trolls

    Imagine the outcry. Just imagine it.

  • On men's grooming

    We’re kind of on board with Eau de Sharknado, to be fair.

  • On gaming

    As a girl who loves to play video games, I can attest to the above being 100% true.

Main image design: Alessia Armenise

Images: Getty/Twitter/iStock

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Kayleigh Dray

Kayleigh Dray is editor of Stylist.co.uk, where she chases after rogue apostrophes and specialises in films, comic books, feminism and television. On a weekend, you can usually find her drinking copious amounts of tea and playing boardgames with her friends. 

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