The best way to operate, according to Carlson, is to divide dishwashing responsibilities equally, whether that means doing it on alternate days or using a ‘you wash, I’ll dry/you stack, I’ll unstack’ system. He suggests that another reason why washing up can cause particular resentment is because it’s a task that naturally lends itself to being shared, unlike many other chores.

“My wife and I could take out the trash together, we could clean the toilet together, but that wouldn’t make much sense,” he observes. Washing up, in contrast, can easily be divided – so when it isn’t, that grates.

This isn’t the first piece of research to identify a link between splitting household chores and relationship happiness. One Swedish study found that both women and men experience psychological distress when tasks aren’t divided evenly, and research by the University of Illinois has shown that women’s marital satisfaction is significantly affected by whether or not chores are divided. That study also found that wives who valued equal sharing of housework were markedly happier if their husbands shared that belief.

In 2018, meanwhile, a post by parenting blogger Constance Hall in which she railed against her partner for not doing his fair share of housework went viral. “Just do the f**king dishes without being asked once in a while mother-f**kers,” she wrote.

So: if you’re living with a partner who doesn’t pull their weight around the house, suggest to them that the happiness of your relationship depends on them doing the washing up more often. You’ve got the research to back you up.

Images: Catt Liu / Unsplash / Pixabay / Getty Images

How relationship happiness is affected by who does the washing up