If there was ever any doubt that karma existed, read the “conundrum” of this guy, who ghosted his girlfriend of three years only for her to be appointed as his boss ten years later.
The almost unbelievable tale (spotted by BuzzFeed) appeared on career advice website, Ask A Manager, where an anonymous poster asked the website community to lend an ear to a story that deserves zero sympathy.
The employee explained that “over a decade ago” he had a girlfriend of three years called Sylvia, with whom he lived with for two years of their relationship.
As he describes it, their “expectations from the relationship were different” and so he did what any normal, rational human being would do and… well, he accepted a job in a different country without telling her.
Yup, that’s right: he waited until she visited her family at Christmas and then moved out of the home they shared together, without any explanation or communication.
“Over the Christmas break, while she was visiting her family, I simply moved out and left the country,” he says. “I took advantage of the fact that I accepted a job in other country and did not tell her about it.
“I simply wanted to avoid being untangled in a break-up drama.”
As if that wasn’t mind-blowing enough, this fine specimen of a man doesn’t sound too sorry about his behaviour, either. In fact, he’s pushed the majority of the blame onto his ex-girlfriend.
“Sylvia was rather emotional and became obsessed with the relationship,” he writes. “She tracked me down, even causedvarious scenes with my parents and friends.”
Or, in other words, she was started to find herself in something akin to a Taken-sequel and wanted to “track down” her long-term boyfriend to make sure he was alive, well, and in possession of a good explanation for his actions.
Fancy that – she must be crazy.
Now, though, it seems that the tables have been well and truly turned.
Our ghoster, who is “happily settled” working as a teacher in an international school, recently learned that his school has hired a new director. And yup, you’ve guessed it, it’s Sylvia.
The author of the post adds that he hasn’t spoken to Sylvia since the “unpleasant” situation (understatement, anyone?) and now has “no idea what to do and how to deal with this mess”.
“There are no other international schools so finding another job in this country is not an option, even finding a job elsewhere is not possible on such a short notice and these jobs usually open for school terms so I have to stay put for few months,” he says.
“To make the situation worse, the expat community here is very small and tightly knit so teachers also socialize a lot.”
Unsurprisingly, the Ask A Manager community have been pretty vocal in their response to this post, with levels of sympathy varying to an incredibly large degree.
One user gave the poster “kudos for recognizing what you did was not ok and being up front”.
Another condemned the behaviour saying: “I don’t know how he could possibly have handled it worse. Perhaps faking his own death?”
A third challenged the poster’s portrayal of Sylvia’s actions, writing: “Of course she was going to be devastated and look for you. And more devastated that there was no note, no official breakup conversation – as far as she knew everything was fine until bam! Gone. No recourse or closure. I’d feel betrayed, hurt, angry and so much more.”
Our favourite reply, though, is this one: “I urge you to do some deep soul searching and reflection, truly understand what you did and the pain you caused, and try and find some actual remorse about it (because I don’t get the sense here that you truly understand what you did, what the reaction was, nor that you feel even remotely sorry).
“After that, reach out to Sylvia and put the ball in her court. How does she want to proceed? If it means your leaving – well, unfortunately that is the price you are going to have to pay. It sucks. But so does what you did to her.”
We know break-ups can be horrendously difficult for both people in the relationship, but the lesson to be learned here is to show respect for the person you’re with and never, ever ghost someone out of cowardliness. Because you’re a human being, sure, but mainly because you never know when or where they’re going to pop up in your life again.
Images: Rex / Giphy / iStock