Merging your life with someone else’s is hard. It sees you mix friends and families, share attitudes on money, blend passions and hobbies – and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. So it’s hardly surprising, then, that there’ll be disagreements and arguments along the road.

While we don’t relish the thought of fighting with a loved one, though, having the occasional argument doesn’t need to be cause for concern.

Actually, fighting has actually proven to be a healthy thing in the long-run, as long as couples approach disputes with a “positive, solutions-focused mentality”.

It’s all well and good saying that we should approach arguments with a solutions-focused mentality, but what are the best ways to reach these solutions? Are there some methods of resolution which work better than others? That allow couples to learn from their differences and move forward? Now, thanks to research, we know the answer is yes.

A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology has found that there is such a thing as the “best way” to move past a conflict, and it’s probably a lot more obvious than you might think. Scientifically termed “active repair,” this approach includes any behaviour that leads to the restoration of affection: the psychological version of “kiss and make up,” basically.

Relationship advice: this is the best way to overcome conflict in your relationship, according to science