If you’ve ever been in any kind of romantic relationship, you’ll know that it requires maintenance. It doesn’t matter if you and your partner share the same interests, goals, sense of humour and find one another unbelievably attractive: if one or both of you isn’t prepared to put the effort in, the relationship is unlikely to last. But what does that effort actually look like?

In a recent study published in the Journal of Family Theory and Review, researchers set out to investigate the methods people use to ensure their love affairs go the distance. After analysing the results of more than 250 papers on the science of romantic relationships, they concluded that there are two primary ways that most couples attempt to stay together: threat mitigation and relationship enhancement.

These terms might sound a little academic, but they’re actually very simple. Threat mitigation can be summed up as the strategies we implement (consciously or unconsciously) to protect our relationship from potential problems. They’re reactive, defensive steps: putting out fires, rather than keeping the home fires burning.

Relationship enhancement, in contrast, is when we proactively try to make our relationship stronger and happier – simply because we want to. These strategies are not a response to something going wrong; they’re things we do for the sake of our own (and our partner’s) pleasure and enjoyment.

Brian Ogolsky, associate professor in the department of human development and family studies at the University of Illinois, was the lead author on the study. He says that for the most part, successful romances will include a combination of both relationship enhancement and threat mitigation tactics.

In other words, people in reasonably content relationships will probably be doing these things already – but a deeper understanding of how romantic behaviour works can be key in helping couples move forward.

Here, we dig into Ogolsky’s research to find out exactly how these common ‘maintenance techniques’ work.

These are the two strategies most people use to maintain a happy relationship