However, other research suggests that many people won’t give a damn what you call yourself. In a study published in the journal Gender Issues in 2017, sociologist Emily Fitzgibbons Shafer of Portland State University found that a woman’s last name choice had little effect on how her status as a wife was perceived by other women and highly educated men in the US.

While attitudes are gradually changing and many women now keep their own surnames after getting married, the name-change convention is still deep-rooted in the UK. According to research conducted by YouGov in 2016, almost 60% of women say they would prefer to take their husband’s name rather than keep their own. A slightly higher percentage of men (61%) wanted their wives to take their names.

Interestingly, different generations did not seem to have significantly different attitudes to this issue. Some 59% of women aged 18-29 said that they would want to take their husband’s surname, compared to 61% of women over the age of 60. Just 2% of women aged 18-29 said they wanted their partner to take their name, while this was the preferred option for 4% of women aged 30-44.

Ultimately, there are many different reasons why women – and men – might choose to keep or change their surnames upon getting married. If you’re deciding whether or not to change your name, remember that it doesn’t matter what other people think of you, your partner, or the power balance in your relationship: what matters is what feels right for you.

This article was originally published on 11 December 2017 and has been updated throughout.

How keeping your own surname changes the way people perceive your marriage