This research found that women who prefer female friends tend to distrust women who prefer male friendships – and vice versa. The results showed that women who preferred friendships with men were viewed as more hostile and less trusting towards other women. On the other hand, women who have mostly male friends may see women who engage in same-sex friendships as jealous or needy.

This, the researchers speculated, is because women involved in female friendships are often suspicious of those in cross-sex friendships because they’re “not always platonic”. Given that women receive different benefits from their friendships with men than they receive from their friendships with other women, people may use a woman’s choice of friendship partners as a source of information about her motivations and behaviors, the very idea that gave birth to the “pick me” in the first place.

Compared to men, women are also much more likely to indicate that men and women can’t be just friends, and as such women who chase those relationships are cast in a negative light. The opposite appears to be true, as well. Last year, psychologists from Monash University found that having a lot of female friends can make men a less attractive prospect to women, as it makes them look like they have “many options” to choose from. Men who advertised having a lot of women as friends were seen as lacking in humility and therefore became 40% less appealing to potential matches.

However, what this does is create a cycle of internalised sexism whereby women are excluded and targeted by their same-sex peers, pushing them towards male groups with seemingly “less drama,”which leads to them further being targeted because of those very friendships.

Is having a lot of male friends a red flag as a woman? Women think so, according to this new study