Back in 1978, an article in The Washington Post used the term ‘love-bombing’ to describe how cults lured in members by making them feel needed and cared for. Forty-five years later, the phrase – which describes someone showering their partner with excessive affection, compliments, gifts, praise, declarations of love and/or pushing for the relationship to move quickly because of the intensity of their feelings – has become part of our everyday vocabulary when analysing romantic relationships. When a 25-year-old man known as ‘West Elm Caleb’ was exposed online last year for pursuing and ghosting dozens of women in New York, his actions were widely discussed as an example of love-bombing. On TikTok, videos tagged #LoveBombing have over 363 million views. In January, Love Island viewers accused Shaq Muhammad of love-bombing fellow contestant Tanya Manhenga after he said he could see himself “falling in love with her” (at the time of writing, the couple are still together).

Situations discussed in the context of love-bombing can feel profoundly hurtful, disappointing or disorienting, without necessarily being abusive. But as a manipulation tactic, love-bombing does often precede – and intersect with – genuine psychological and physical abuse, stalking and harassment.

Prosecutors have been told to take love-bombing seriously – here’s why that matters