The day after Deyjah Harris’ 16th birthday, she found a post-it note affixed to her bedroom door: ‘Gyno. Tomorrow. 9:30.’

The note was written by her father, the rapper and actor TI – you might know him from Marvel’s Ant-Man movies, or from his collaborations with Destiny’s Child and Pharrell – a controversial figure in the music world who has twice served prison time. The note was a solemn reminder of what was awaiting her: a trip to the gynaecologist, accompanied by her father, to ensure that her hymen was still intact and, therefore, she remained a virgin.

TI opened up about this so-called ‘parenting practice’ on a podcast this week. To give him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he was joking. Certainly, the hosts of the podcast laughed when he suggested it. But then the rapper went into more detail, telling them how he has escorted his daughter to the doctor on multiple occasions for pelvic exams, and that he has circumvented any privacy that her daughter has about her own body and medical information in order to receive the results of her ‘virginity check’ himself.

Since TI made the remarks, Harris has unfollowed him on social media, as well as liking tweets that referred to his behaviour as “disgusting, possessive and controlling”. TI has responded in kind, also unfollowing his daughter on Instagram and Twitter.

TI: the rapper’s comments just reminded us why the hymen is a feminist issue