If you’re a woman who doesn’t want kids, you’re probably used to having to defend your position. At worst, saying that you’re not interested in motherhood elicits suspicion or anger from others – but a more common response is the simple assumption that you will, eventually, come around.
“You’ll change your mind when you meet the right man!” is a popular refrain, and one that makes us want to bang our heads against a brick wall.
But how best to respond, when informed that you’ll want children eventually? Enter Anna Kendrick: actress, singer, and sarcastic Twitter comedian extraordinaire.
Kendrick doesn’t want to be a mother. She is on record on the matter, stating in her new memoir, Scrappy Little Nobody: “I will always feel children aren’t for me.”
But in a recent interview with E! News, Kendrick was pulled up on this line by a reporter, who asks if she stands by what she said.
Seeing as it’s a fairly unambiguous statement in a book that has literally just come out, it seems unlikely that Kendrick has had a sudden change of heart. But she tackles the question like a pro, regardless.
“Yeah,” she says, widening those cartoonish eyes of hers. “You know, if I have kids, it’s just another kid that your kid is going to have to fight when the water wars come.”
Water wars – conflict over access to water resources – are a problem that is anticipated to get worse in the relatively near future, thanks to climate change, a surging world population and industrialisation.
Read more: “Why I chose to have an abortion aged 35”
“The zombie apocalypse is coming,” Kendrick continues, deadpan, “and with my genes I don’t think [my children] would really last.”
Indicating her small frame, she says: “I’m worried about upper body strength, coordination. These are not things that I would pass on. So, you know. [My kids] are just going to be food.”
Invoking the zombie apocalypse: a novel way of getting around the question of why you don’t want children, and one we recommend everyone tries in future.
Image: Rex Features