Times columnist Caitlin Moran’s brilliant new book, How To Be A Woman, tackles what it means to be a woman in the 21st century. Here, she answers the modern feminist’s BIG questions.

In 2011, there are several questions a modern feminist must ask herself. The first is, “What is modern feminism?” The second is “OK – given that there appears to be no such thing as clear-cut modern feminism, what would I like it to be?” The third will probably then be, “Why am I talking to myself? Jesus. Man, I need to get out more. I’m gonna go to the cornershop, and get a grab bag of McCoys.”

Growing risk of talking to yourself aside – and once you’ve eaten the crisps obviously – being able to apply yourself to working out what modern feminism should be is one of the great, and unexpected, pleasures of the age. They# thought feminism had ground to a halt when no new generation of feminist thinkers, à la Greer, Millett, Roiphe etc – came along. But they were wrong! Because having no generation of new feminist thinkers means we – womankind – have just got to get on and sort this sh*t out for ourselves. Yeah! Like when there’s a meeting at work to “plan” “forward strategy” and everyone fannies away two-and-a-half hours doing precisely nothing in the most longwinded way possible, and then you and your mate Claire sort it all out in the lift on the way home. Yeah. Like that. You know what I’m saying.

1. I feel in my bones that Lady Gaga is a true strident feminist and good for my soul – but how do I square this with the fact that she’s constantly walking around in her bra and pants, even at, like, airports and stuff, where even nudists wear a fleece and linen drawstring trousers?

Well first, because Gaga has described herself as a feminist, which – in these dark days where Goldie Hawn describes herself as a “feminist to a point”. What point? Equality? Voting rights? Not having builders shouting “Oi! Tits McGee!” at you? – is no small beer. But secondly, although Gaga does, clearly, deal in sexual imagery, hers is not the bouncy, willing, “Yes. I’m into S&M and will happily be hog-tied and ball-gagged in my new video, despite it all being a bit creepy when you remember I’m only 23, got signed to a record label when I was 16 and was bitten ON THE FACE by my last boyfriend,” schtick of Rihanna.

The “sexiness” in Gaga’s videos is neurotic, damaged, freakish, furious – she’s dressed in meat; she’s covered in blood; she’s wearing shoes that look like armadillos and setting fire to a man in a bed. If anyone’s managing to get aroused over the video to Bad Romance, good luck to them. As Gaga said in interview, “It’s not for straight guys to masturbate over.” It’s for women and gays to talk about. It’s self-expression, not a peepshow.

2. Germaine Greer once said, “[If a woman] never takes off her high-heeled shoes, how will she ever know how far she could walk or how fast she could run?” So can I be a feminist and still dress up all sexy, like?

Of course you can! OBVIOUSLY. There’s no POINT in feminism if, when the mood takes you, and/or you are in oestrus, and wish to mate, you can’t slut up in some top-ranking freakum dress and absolutely grind on the dancefloor like you heard they were handing out gold medals for hotness. You’re a furry mammal. This is your birthright. YOU GO GIRLFRIEND.

Caitlin Moran's guide to being a modern feminist