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Emilia Clarke’s advice on self-love and kindness is an absolute must-read

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Shannon Peter
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Having endured two life-threatening brain aneurysms, Game Of Thrones actor and Clinique global brand ambassador Emilia Clarke has learnt the importance of going easy on yourself.

Sometimes, it’s easier to be kinder to others than it is yourself. Thankfully, Emilia Clarke is well versed in the art of self-compassion.

Here, she shares her tried-and-tested tips with Stylist readers. Enjoy!

ACCEPT YOUR EMOTIONS

“Everyone has a nasty [internal] voice. I think the technical term is a ‘persecutory superego’. I call mine Steve. But everybody has a nice voice too. It says, ‘If you feel you want to cry, fucking cry. If you want to rage, get that pillow and scream into it.’ Accept those emotions, don’t try and push them away. And when your nasty voice is being unkind, listen out for your nice voice, which will say, ‘Why have you got to be so mean, why can’t you just be kind?’’’

AVOID COMPARISON

“When you find yourself comparing your life to all the amazing things someone else has, say to yourself, ‘But they can’t do this particular thing that I do really well,’ or ‘They don’t have this thing that I do’ to counterbalance it. Or just don’t look. I mute a lot. When my nasty voice is screaming, I mute more than ever.”

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Emilia Clarke as Daenerys in Game of thrones
Thankfully, there are no Daenerys-style meltdowns in real life.

SHOUT ABOUT YOUR GOOD DEEDS

“Comparison can be a good thing when it comes to action for the greater good. I don’t mean white saviour stuff, I mean if you want to Instagram that you went back home and helped your nan with the shopping, pop that on if you want to. It’s that sort of stuff that makes us think, ‘Oh, I could do that, I should call my family, or help a friend in need.’ Something that is real.”

MAKE LIFE EASIER FOR YOURSELF

“If I have an early start the next day, I lay out my clothes and pack my handbag the night before. I might even go to the lengths of popping out my tea mug. Just little things to help me get ready really quickly.”

Emilia Clarke getting her make up done as a Clinique global ambassador
Clarke is the new face of Clinique.

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CELEBRATE YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS

“I went through a phase where I would write myself a postcard about an experience I was proud of. Not ‘I won an award’ or ‘I met Brad Pitt.’ More like, ‘This person said they thought my acting was good, which affected me on a meaningful level. I’m writing to you to remind you that this happened.’”

TAKE TIME OUT

“Thanks to social media, we often think that someone is watching every action we perform. Once in a while, remind yourself there ain’t no one watching. If you want to cotch on your sofa, eating Nando’s, watching Desperate Housewives, do it. And guess what, you don’t need to tell anyone either.”

Emilia Clarke is Clinique’s first global brand ambassador for skincare and make-up; clinique.co.uk

Photography: Courtesy of Clinique

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