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FKA Twigs’ reflections on her exes perfectly sum up why break-ups can be empowering

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Hannah-Rose Yee
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Speaking to Zane Lowe on Apple Music’s Beats 1, the singer has spoken about how separation helped her understand herself better, and her comments are a must-read for anyone going through heartbreak. 

Everyone who has been through a break-up knows that feeling of untangling yourself from someone else’s life. How it can be awful and messy and yet also, in its own way, wonderful to separate your strands from theirs and move forward on your own.

It’s a painful process, yes, but in a new interview with Zane Lowe on Apple Music’s Beats 1, singer FKA Twigs has spoken about why the breakdown of a relationship can actually be an empowering thing.

“Like when you’re with somebody, your lives become very entwined, with like your friends and family, your routine,” she explained. “And then the unmeshing is like you have to really find out – well I had to really find out who I was. But I’ve always known who I am, but it’s just kind of discovering who I was in adult crisis… I feel like I’ve never known myself better.”

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Twigs was reflecting on the big relationships of her adult life, including her three year one with Robert Pattinson. The pair began dating in 2014 and were engaged in 2015 before splitting in 2017. (Earlier this year, Twigs dated Shia Labeouf, but the pair split in June.) 

FKA Twigs and Robert Pattinson at the 2016 Met Gala.

Speaking to Lowe, Twigs explained that her second album Magdalene, out now, explores the ways in which she reached a better understanding of herself and her needs after going through a break-up.

“When I had realised that so many other women had been through what I had been through, as a woman, I was taught that your Prince Charming would choose you, and when he did, you were grateful,” she explained.

Heartbreak taught her to demand more from a relationship, it highlighted the importance of always prioritising herself, even when with a partner. “It was more about being chosen than you asking like, ‘What’s right for me?’ and ‘What do I need to be nurtured, or to feel complete?’ For me, Magdalene is unraveling that, and finding my voice without society’s whispers.”

She added: “I feel now like my time is so precious. I feel like my body is so precious. I feel like words are so precious. I just have a newfound respect for like, keeping the right temperature around me that like suits me. I feel more open, I feel softer. I feel like I giggle more… [I have a] new blueprint for who I want to be as a human and how I want to live my life and how I want to make my art.” 

FKA Twigs has spoken about how breakups have empowered her.

Twigs’ words are a vital reminder that, no matter how successful or famous they are, celebrities muddle their way through break-ups just like the rest of us.

This was the message that Maya Jama wanted to share with the world after her break-up with Stormzy earlier in the year. In an interview, Jama described how celebrity break-ups are unrealistically portrayed in the media.

“I used to read magazines when I was little and see all these Hollywood people break up and they didn’t feel like real people,” she said.

“And then when you’re in that position, you’re like, oh shit, it’s very real. Everybody just sees it as entertainment. These things never last that long. People find something else to talk about.”

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She added that, after her break-up, she was leaning on her friends for support. “I forgot how much I loved just literally being in a house with loads of my friends, eating, talking, drinking. I was like, I miss this a little bit. I’m having fun,’ she said. “I’m scared to date. I haven’t been single in so long, how the fuck do you flirt any more? I’ve been basically with my friends 24/ 7.”

Sound familiar? Twigs and Jama’s words are a reminder that, when it comes to break-ups, celebrities really are just like us. 

Images: Getty

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Hannah-Rose Yee

Hannah-Rose Yee is a writer based in London. You can find her on the internet talking about movies, television and Chris Pine.

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