Whether it’s a small family do or full royal flummery, one factor that unites all weddings is the sheer volume of preparation and high emotion in the lead up to The Big Day.

There is one thing, however, that is often overlooked in all this. And that’s what comes after it. Namely, a big, fat f**king comedown.

After planning the fairytalest of fairytale weddings – a castle, royalty and an actual prince, the one who’s kept his hair and never has to be king! – just think what, assuming there was no wedding day drama, Meghan Markle will have to get used to. New husband, new job (modern princessing is not like in the days of old, when you could lounge around on your four-poster bed until you fancied getting up to arrange your jewels and consume some choice bits of swan; now you have to graft, albeit in the designer clothes of your choice). New boss (the Queen), new family (the Queen with her crown off), new home in a new country… Plus, she’s got to be a role model to millions, and smile unceasingly while the nation’s press speculates endlessly on the readiness of her reproductive system to host the royal sperm and transform it into a little carroty babby that will help take our minds off the parlous state of the world.

True, she will have money and comforts aplenty to draw the post-nuptial sting, but honestly, you couldn’t pay me enough to negotiate that comedown again.

“The stark reality of the post-wedding blues”