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Paloma Faith perfectly explains why she’s keeping her child’s gender a secret

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Emily Reynolds
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Since giving birth, Paloma Faith has been refreshingly honest about motherhood. And now she’s opened up about why she’s keeping her child’s gender secret. 

Paloma Faith is not what you’d call a conventional person – you only have to look at some of her somewhat zany fashion choices to see that. And her approach to motherhood has been no different.

And in a new interview, Faith has opened up even more. Speaking to the Daily Mail’s You magazine, Faith explained why she’s not sharing her child’s gender. 

“I won’t say whether I have a boy or a girl for privacy reasons. I want my child to go to normal schools and integrate with kids from different backgrounds as a human being, not as a child of a celebrity.”

But it’s Faith’s approach to gender identity that’s perhaps the most inspiring. She’s previously talked about dressing her child in gender neutral clothes, and has been keen to stress that children should be given ‘girls’ and ‘boys’ toys to play with. 

“Dolls are important for both girls and boys; children can learn about nurturing, and equally both should be able to build things and play with toy cars,” she said. 

Faith also says she has “no problem if my child grows up not feeling an affinity with the gender they were born with”. 

“It’s important to me they’re given all the opportunities to be the person they want to be.”

“I want my child to feel that everything is available to them”

It’s not the only thing Faith has opened up about regarding parenting – she’s also been brutally honest about how difficult motherhood can be.

In the Mail interview, Faith describes having a baby as “the most difficult thing I’ve ever done”. She had an emergency caesarean section, and then developed an infection in her womb that left her bed-ridden for three months. “I felt very disappointed,” she said. “I’d wanted a baby for so long, but in those early weeks I felt as though I couldn’t be the mother I wanted to be.” 

“Not enough people talk about how hard childbirth can be because they worry it might undermine the love they have for their child,” she continued. “I found it a living hell, yet it’s the best thing I’ve ever done and I’d love to do it again.”

And in November of last year, Faith also spoke candidly to BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour about the struggles of early parenthood.

BBC Woman's Hour - Paloma Faith on Motherhood

"Why didn't any of you prepare me for this?"Paloma Faith shares some truths about motherhood.More from BBC Woman's Hour: http://bbc.in/2jwGqyO

Posted by BBC Radio 4 on Thursday, November 16, 2017

“I think it’s really important for everyone to be more honest about the birth,” she said. “When I had my really terrible birth, I was quite shocked by all these people who came out of the woodwork around me who were like ‘oh yeah, it’s awful! And the first three months are like the worst time of your life, ever’.”

I was like ‘why didn’t any of you prepare me for this before’?!”.

“I think people think and believe that if you say that, it suggests that you don’t care or love your child as much, which is completely wrong. It’s worth it in the end, but for the first six months and for the birth…it was a drag. No other word!”. 

And on her latest album, The Architect, she’s also sent an important message about maternity leave, describing the album as a “message I wanted to give employers”. 

“Women aren’t less committed to work after a baby”. 

Images: Rex Features