Beth Ditto has reflected on what it was like to marry and divorce a friend she’d know for 14 years, and it’s a fascinating listen about a complex issue.
Ever since she first burst into our lives as lead singer of The Gossip, Ditto has always spoken her truth in the most empowering and fun ways.
That’s why her interview on the newest episode of the Changes With Annie Macmanus podcast is well worth the listen.
Ditto talks about growing up in an opinionated family, coming out, living with her sick auntie, and the difficulties she has experienced being in a same-sex relationship.
But there is one thread of conversation that is particularly fascinating: Ditto’s decisions to marry and divorce her best friend.
In 2013, Ditto married her long-term girlfriend Kristin Ogata in Hawaii, after knowing each other for 14 years. But by 2018, the pair separated.
“We were very close! Like inseparable, we were always together,” she recalls about their friendship. “So you think it’s going to be a good idea, don’t you?”
She continues: “Think about all the shit that annoys you about your very best friend… now marry them. It’s weird because I was 31, almost 32, and you feel like you’re like, ‘I’m grown [up] now.’
“I’m almost 40 and I’m like what a dumb arse, what a dumb arse.”
Explaining their decision to get married, Ditto continues: “We always had this pact that we would get married when I was 32 and she was 35. Isn’t that crazy?
“In hindsight we always had a very strong love for each other and even romantically. Physically we loved each other very much…
“Sadly, we don’t really talk now.”
Talking about her new relationship with Teddy Kwo, she says: “I didn’t really realise how our relationship was until I got with Teddy and I was like, ‘Oh, this is actual happiness’. For the first time I was like I’d go anywhere with him.”
Describing the fulfillment she now feels, Ditto adds: “The feeling of being happy. You know, like genuine.
“And the other thing is me realising I’d never had that feeling before. I’ve been in love, I know what it feels like to be in love and how warm and beautiful and terrifying that feeling is, but I never realised that love shouldn’t be terrifying. You shouldn’t be constantly afraid to lose it.”
Images: Getty, Changes with Annie Macmanus
Hollie is a digital writer at Stylist.co.uk, mainly covering the daily news on women’s issues, politics, celebrities and entertainment. She also keeps an ear out for the best podcast episodes to share with readers. Oh, and don’t even get her started on Outlander…