When it comes to our closest friends, maintaining healthy boundaries is the key to a successful and mutually fulfilling relationship.

Of course, in an ideal world we’d want to be available for every emotional 1am drunk dial, after-work rant or post-break-up movie night, but there is also a fine line to be walked between availability and exhaustion.

And even though we try to fill our lives with friends that we know would be there if we needed them, most of us will also have those ‘friends’ that just don’t seem to have the time for us. You can’t seem to pin them down to do anything in the future and you always feel like they’re one foot in and one foot out of the relationship.

They may be historic friendships that could do with a little nurturing, but every time you text them they leave you on read for days. Or they could be the chronically flaky friend, who always changes the plans or cancels at the last minute.

But when this happens time and time again, it becomes more than just an annoying habit. It could be an indication of “commitment phobia”, something which, according to psychologists, doesn’t just happen in romantic relationships.

“Commitment phobia is the fear and anxiety when getting close to people, or making relationship decisions that have a long-lasting effect,” Tahura Adil, MSc, the psychologist behind the @mindovermoon Instagram account explains.

Friendship psychology: how commitment phobia is affecting our friendships, and how we can tackle it