Sex, dating and relationships

No Love Lost: how love, sex and relationships (mostly) survived a truly awful year

Posted by for Relationships

From attachment theory to sexting, No Love Lost explores how our experiences of relationships and dating have been changed and challenged during lockdown.

Hands up if you’ve felt lost in the last 12 months? Disorientated, confused and generally pissed off? You’re not alone.

Over the course of the coronavirus pandemic and the trauma that was inflicted in 2020, it’s the feeling of frustration and anxiety that’s bubbled beneath the surface of our collective consciousness. Memes point to the pain the world experienced in an ‘unprecedented’ year. We hopefully rushed to see in 2021 in the hope that we could leave the mess of the year before behind us. And, though it’s a bit bleak, there’s an unspoken comfort in knowing that a stranger on the other side of our phones or laptop screens is feeling the same way as we do. 

It’s quite romantic, actually. No, really. From Wuthering Heights to The Notebook, nothing quite colours matters of the heart like the shared sense of impending doom. But if we flip the script and clear the heavy fog that’s been circulating for a year, we’ll realise that it’s not just the disaster stories that unite us. There are the ever so slightly smaller stories of hope and heart that have been running along in parallel.

This is how we arrive at No Love Lost: the double entendre of a seemingly shit year. 

We’re dedicating a week of content to the love stories that have gotten us to the other side of 2020. Though it’s been a struggle to recognise all the time, sex was still high on the agenda over the last year. Granted, it waned in the face of adversity or has even been non-existent in the typical sense for those of us who have been physically isolated by social distancing rules, but in some cases, it’s also been a lifeline for physical release or one of the many ways we’ve toyed with our boundaries and found something pretty exciting on the other side. 

Intimacy has taken on a whole new meaning in a world where touch has been illuminated from many of our repertoires. We’ve craved it physically and created it digitally, but has it changed what we want from relationships? Thankfully we’re well poised to find out.

And what of those of us who have spent an extraordinary amount of time in shared spaces with those we care about? New challenges have popped up and old habits have had to adapt to varying degrees of success. But at the root of the bickering, breakups and enforced bonding that we’ve all muddled through under the weight of the Covid 19, is the glimmering force of love; a small word with big meaning that also connects us all in the most surprising of ways.

This week we’re going to explore how has love adapted, struggled and flourished against the odds. From the woman who got a lifetime ban from a dating app and an exploration of ‘attachment theory’ to the guilt around lockdown weddings and feeling pressured to be friends with your partner’s friends; watch this space to find out how love has lasted (and was not lost) in the last 12 months.

Image: Shingi Rice, Unsplash

Sign up for the latest news and must-read features from Stylist, so you don't miss out on the conversation.

By entering my email I agree to Stylist’s Privacy Policy

Share this article