“Playing it cool is often a tactic used to avoid being seen as too clingy or desperate, which is exactly what they want from you. It can also be the sign of someone with an avoidant attachment style,” says Begy.

Because while dating profiles should be all about what you do want and explain the kind of person you’d love to meet, it shouldn’t be an opportunity to police very reasonable behaviour before you’ve even said hello.

“Looking for somebody who doesn’t take themselves too seriously has become so loaded that even if your intentions were innocent, you could be turning off plenty of potential matches without even realising it,” Begy agrees. Therefore, if you do want somebody that can laugh at themselves and be silly, even when life gets tough, then daters should say that, rather than use a generic line. After all, the best profiles are unique, full of character and really reflect who you are as an individual.

Ultimately, while dating should be fun, the process is very often not. Juggling our own expectations with those of someone else can be a tricky balance without having to shy away from being serious when we want to. Instead, we should embrace being as pensive or nonchalant as we like – for as long as it serves us.

Why do so many dating profiles in 2023 ask you ‘not to take yourself too seriously’?