When Clara* and her partner of two years broke up during lockdown, one of the first things she did was empty her camera roll. “I knew I’d be tempted to reminisce, but it was painful to look at,” she tells Stylist. “We didn’t necessarily end on bad terms; however, it was far too soon to look at the time we were happy.”

If you’ve ever been through the kind of soul-crushing breakup that has you wondering if you’ll ever feel ‘right’ again, you’ll likely understand what is a very common paradox. On the one hand, there’s a burning desire to scrape every molecule of their existence from your life. On the other, the strange urge to cling to the remnants of a relationship that you already know, deep down, is too far gone.

Once we come to our senses and enter this purge mode, we split physically, returning jumpers and divvying out shared possessions. We unfollow our ex and anyone else associated with them on social media, limiting the excruciating possibility of seeing them exist, happily, without us. It happens through tears, fits of anger and endless cajoling from our nearest and dearest, but what do we do with the most poignant of reminders: the pictures?

To keep or delete? What should you do with pictures of your ex after a breakup?