I tap on my Instagram and go to Blocked Accounts, and there her account appears. She is smiling, head tilted and framed in a perfect circle. A green dot glowing towards the bottom left tells me she is currently active. This is my estranged mother; I haven’t spoken to her in years.

I am at peace with this arrangement, and I believe she is too. But many onlookers are not. Maternal estrangement makes them feel uncomfortable. ‘But she’s your mum…’, ‘You’ve only got one’ and ‘Oh, you two will reconnect at some point’ are the usual responses. The implication is that this is a situation that requires fixing and reconciliation is the only remedy.

I’m one of many adult daughters who are estranged from their mothers. We are a silent group, but a cohort that could be on the rise. Up to 10% of mothers are estranged from at least one adult child, with academic researchers and therapists saying that they’re witnessing a ‘silent epidemic’ of family breakups more generally. In the UK, the charity Stand Alone estimates that one in five families will be touched by family estrangement and its consequences.

“I’m at peace with being estranged from my mum – so why does it make everyone else so uncomfortable?”