2. Learning and researching

Many of us have googled “signs my partner is a narcissist” or something similar at least once, and the rise of TikTok “therapy” has given us a greater awareness of things like coercion, gaslighting and breadcrumbing.

“This is the stage when you research all of the things,” agrees Gillis. “You know something is off with the person’s behaviour, but researching everything and anything about it gives you the terminology to understand your experiences.”

But while it’s human instinct to try to make sense of our own and other people’s actions, it’s important not to get caught up in “diagnoses” of personality and mental health disorders that have not been verified by professionals.

While everyone can (and often does) exhibit narcissistic tendencies, not everyone is clinically narcissistic, so be sure to take everything you read with a pinch of salt.

Toxic relationships: how to understand the 6 stages of recovery everyone goes through