Should you talk about past relationships with a new partner?

Betrayal and heartbreak are always difficult to come to terms with, and it absolutely takes time to rebuild trust in new love interests.

It’s okay to have emotional scars, no one is perfect, but before cultivating a new relationship, Mee advises starting your own healing process so the scabs from the wounds caused by past relationships don’t impact the positive experiences you hope to create with your new partner.

“Some people are able to overcome trauma, others tend to find ways to cope with it. Self-development, mindfulness or mindful meditation and therapy are a few ways to process trauma,” she explains.

“Whenever you feel triggered, or perhaps a conversation with your new partner serves as a reminder of a negative experience with an ex, take note and responsibility of these traumas, feel every emotion without self-judgement.

“Although trauma dumping may be done unconsciously, understanding that your partner is a human who has their own experiences and possible traumas is important. You don’t want a situation where an oversharing of your own trauma triggers theirs, causing more toxicity in the relationship.

“Unlike a therapist who can listen to your trauma from a non-judgemental perspective, help you learn from it and move on, your partner may lack the capacity to guide you through the process. So it’s always best to talk to a professional.”

Why we need to be aware of “trauma dumping on dates” and how to avoid doing it without realising