All that taken into account, it unsurprising that some women even think about their bridal party tactically in order to avoid problems. Belle, 38, chose her bridesmaids “because I knew that they would be fun to plan with and helpful on the day. I even asked a friend who worked in food and drink marketing to plot my hen do, because I knew she’d organise a fab meal at a swish restaurant. I don’t feel bad about it, as I wanted to have the best wedding possible.”

If you do choose an old friend to be at the centre of your wedding, be aware that dynamics might shift. “My best friend and I had always got on well because we were opposites: I was the quiet one, while she was the life and soul of the party,” remembers Priti, 30. “When I got engaged, however, she found it really difficult to handle me being the centre of attention for once. She was my maid of honour, but ended up making it all about her at every turn, from what she was going to wear to what she would say in her speech. She even announced that she had a new boyfriend on the night of my hen do, which everyone spent the whole evening discussing. After that, our friendship was never the same again.”

According to Bose, weddings highlight the everyday subtleties of friendships. “Normally, you may not be bothered by a friend who’s more gregarious than you, but now, it’s more complicated,” she says. “Or perhaps, deep down, you always felt this way about a friend, but it hasn’t been enough to create problems before. When one friend is used to taking up more space or shining a bit brighter, it can be very hard to have that role reversed. It goes without saying that this is often all subconscious and goes unspoken.”

Sometimes, tempers become so frayed that a key bridal party member is dropped altogether. When Anika, 26, was a bridesmaid for an old school friend last year, she was shocked at how unreasonable the bride’s sister – who was also the maid of honour – became. “She basically rode roughshod over all the bride’s demands from the start and didn’t listen to any of the other bridesmaids in the group chat,” she recalls. “In the end, so many of us complained about her behaviour that she was dropped as the maid of honour. As they’re sisters and were close before, she and the bride have been able to patch up their relationship – but it was horrible to witness at the time.”

The best way to ensure that a wedding goes without a hitch – whether you’re a bride, a maid of honour or a bridesmaid – is to rely on good, old-fashioned communication, says Bose. “If you don’t talk, that’s where assumption and offence starts,” she says. “It’s always worth addressing the situation. You have to slow down and remember, this is most likely a friend you want for life.”

And if all else fails? Follow my lead by opting for no bridesmaids at all – you’ll have all your friends around you on the big day, with everyone feeling the love. And at the end of the day, isn’t that really what a wedding is about?

Secret tactics and epic fall outs: how picking bridesmaids got so complicated